One Thing I Wish My Kids Master in Life

Our world is a changing one. Our work places are changing, job titles, working conditions, living conditions and so many other aspects of our lives. Technology is allowing us to automate, simplify and in general, make our lives better.

One thing that technology has claimed to do is connect people better. I remember in school sitting at the landline telephone waiting for a call to come, that I had pre-arranged with a friend at a specific time. Nowadays anyone can get hold of you anywhere with the help of a cellphone. Primary school kids have cellphones! I used to walk round with a prepaid card for public payphones in my back pocket at school… Things have changed…

While it seems we are closer and its easier to get in touch with each other, we seem to be loosing connection with each other.

We’re being confined to digital versions of our conversations that lack both verbal and non-verbal communication. (Think text messages, tweets, status updates, etc.) The content is there, but the context is lacking. And as much as there are hundreds of emoji’s nothing can compare to the actual expression on your face when you say what you want to say.

Non-verbal communication alone accounts for 55% of what message is being conveyed. That doesn’t even take into account the tone, speed and pitch of voice. How can you get any of that via a screen?

However, it is a reality of our current lifestyle. Having said that, if there is one thing that I wish for my kids to learn more than anything else on the this planet, it would be to be able to effectively communicate with others. And I am not just talking about the languages they can speak or the use of their words. Nor am I talking about the depth of literacy or ability to phrase things in certain ways.

I am referring to the ability to better understand others, so that they can empathize and therefore see the world the same way that others do. This allows for them to take on a different viewpoint (even if they do not agree with it) and better understand the thought processes and emotions of others. This skill is what makes great leaders and allows creatives to think outside of the box.

Being able to effectively communicate with others is not just about knowing who you are talking to, but knowing yourself and how your personality interacts with theirs. Communication is a give and take, ebb and flow of information.

If you would like to better understand yourself so that you can better communicate and interact with others, then I would highly recommend you head over to and take the free online test.

The information is applicable to any and all aspects of your live. How you deal with stress at work, love your partner, deal with your colleagues, present proposals to business partners and communicate with friends around the braai.

Think of it as a blueprint to how you tend to communicate with the world.

Firstly, by understanding this you can accept your tendencies, but secondly, it also gives you a starting point to start adjusting and becoming more flexible in how you choose to communicate.

People that are effective communicators are flexible communicators. If you know you have a tendency to be stubborn, you can tone that down when you have to deal with a superior, or maybe in a situation that would be better off without that. Results are more important than the satisfaction of being right and sticking to your guns.

Take the test and learn more about yourself. You’re going to be stuck with you your whole life anyway. Become aware of which traits work well for you and which need some attention and flexibility in certain situations.

Other than dealing with others, you will learn to deal with yourself. When working towards your goals and aspirations, we face many obstacles and challenges along the way. The biggest of them are our own internal walls we put up for ourselves. If you know what tendencies you have, you can plan specifically for them.

I fall under The Architect Personality type. They only make up about 0.8% of the world’s population, which confirms my high value in being unique and different to others, but the downside to that is that we feel sometimes very alienated from others.

Some of my weaknesses include: arrogant, judgmental, overly-analytical, loathe highly structured environments & clueless at romance. Having known this has allowed me to slowly overcome these and learn strategies and skills to be better at what my tendencies have not allowed me.

“If you want to master the world, start by mastering yourself”

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About The Author

Neil Scholtz

Neil Scholtz is a certified Personal Trainer turned CrossFit coach. He has competed at the CrossFit Games and coached athletes that have competed at the CrossFit Games, but that's not his main focus. Most of his time is spent consulting or coaching individuals to improve their lives through fitness. He has worked with over 1000 individuals from various walks of life. Tailoring solutions to their lifestyle needs.

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